The Triumph of Lugh

Characters

Balar an Iron Age god

Lugh “

Nuada “

Villagers in Iron Age times

Diggers working at the Museum

DIGGER(S)

The Museum of the Iron Age in Andover, Hampshire: an opportunity unique in Britain to experience one of the great formative periods of our history. Here the fullest picture of a prehistoric hillfort has been brought - all too vividly, as we shall see - to life.

And that’s what our story is about: for what we are about to show you actually happened here on a Saturday afternoon not so very long ago. While members of the public were happily perusing the fabulous display downstairs, upstairs hard at work were the people who dig the past up - literally, of course: the diggers. Us! We were tired and fed up, as usual.

DIGGERS

All day long we’re made to work,

never a chance to rest or shirk.

From early morning we’re made to toil

moving lots of filthy soil.

Digging all day is such a grind;

nothing special do we find.

Knees are aching, blisters hurt,

finger nails are full of dirt.

We hunt for objects, scrub them clean,

write down carefully where they’ve been,

put them in boxes, cart them away -

and do the same each dreary day.

We’ve unearthed these ancient stones,

and found countless animal bones.

All this stuff’s come out of the ground...

hey! stop! wow! look what we’ve found!

The diggers have found a skeleton of monstrous proportions - there is a stunned silence.

DIGGER 1

Amazing!

DIGGER 2

Preposterous!

DIGGER 3

What is it?

DIGGER 4

That wasn’t there yesterday!

DIGGER 5

Doesn’t look like anything we’ve ever seen before!

Rosie turns the head round -

DIGGERS

Be careful!

It must be a fake!

Rubbish! It’s real.

It’s looking at us!

Get the Curator!

He’s fallen asleep!

Drinking tea, more likely!

We went off to fetch him and when we returned

a terrible thing had happened...

the finds had vanished...and Rosie, too!...

what were we going to do?

We rushed downstairs and a search was started

the museum closed its doors

no-one had entered or left, we were told,

our bodies were shaking, our blood ran cold...

(a piercing scream is heard as one of the attendants find a creature amongst the exhibits)

DIGGER 6

Help!

DIGGER 7

It’s Rosie! She’s ...

DIGGER 8

Come and look! It’s here - that object - it seems to have come alive!

(they approach cautiously)

DIGGER 9

It’s all right - it seems friendly enough - it’s beckoning to us.

DIGGERS

What about Rosie?

BALAR

She’ll be fine!

DIGGERS

Who are you?

BALAR

My name is Balar ...

DIGGER 10

Balar - that’s a one-eyed monster. A god!

BALAR

A warrior-god! Revered by those that roamed these parts many years ago. A temple they built me in this great fort which you now call Danebury, the greatest town in Wessex then.

DIGGER 11

Tell us about yourself. If you’re real, of course.

What was life like in your time?

BALAR

Real? Of course, I’m real! How do you think Rosie...

DIGGER 12

Have you killed her? You monster!

BALAR

I’m no monster - but a god! I have some power over death, you know. I used to, anyway.

We’ll have to see what we can do about Rosie. She gave me a fright!

DIGGERS

She gave you a fright!

Balar started telling us his story:

BALAR

As a god I was lucky. But those who followed me depended on food.

The people toiled hard to provide for their families;

hillforts were built with huge defenses

since, robbed of their stores, they’d starve.

When the harvest was plentiful -

they lived life to the full.

At the festival they made their offerings to me...

The Tribe are preparing for harvest festival, they process through the ramparts into the village.

VILLAGERS

We’ve been working in the fields,

gathering in the corn,

bringing home the wheat

to the sound of the horn.

And now our stores are full

we’re ready to rejoice.

Prepare the fatted pig

as we sing with one voice:

Enjoy the food and drink the wine!

Let spirits rise at harvest time!

BALAR

Now the Dans - they were different. A different sort of being altogether. Gods too, of course. But they had brains, lots of skills, magic some would have said. My daughter Ethne married a Dan - a perfect match. His name was Shan, the son of Kek, the most famous Druid of the Dans. They were a wonderful couple. And the wedding brought peace between our two families - for a while.

PEOPLE

O lord of all, hear our prayer,

bless this young couple so handsome and so fair:

he nobly born, son of Kek, a priest,

Balar’s her father, famous for his feats.

Her peace and purpose renowned through Formor’s land,

his daring deeds bring honour to the Dans!

Our offerings we raise, o may we see the signs

that the fruit of their union will be good and kind!

May the Formors and the Dans unite - now that you are wed.

Blessings on you both and on your wedding bed.

BALAR

Ethne and Shan had a son; he grew to be handsome and clever like his father and strong and down-to-earth like his mother’s folk. They called him Lug. Now - Nuada was the rightful king, I have to admit. He ruled his people wisely and converted them to a modern way of living. But our King Bres was a conqueror, a fighter. Formors, you remember, were strong. And one, in particular, was invincible. That was me. None could fight me and survive. Hardly anyone dared to try.

DIGGER 13

Why? What was it about you that made you so formidable?

BALAR

My eye.

DIGGERS

Your eye?

BALAR

I only had to look at somebody and that person was dead.

It was terrible to behold, but I, of course, was the only one who saw it.

DIGGER 13

You were telling us about King Bres.

BALAR

King Bres was a Formor, too. But he was not a wise king. With me at his side he was a formidable conqueor. As time passed the people grew restless and so the Dans installed their own king, King Nuada, as overlord. There was obviously going to be a battle between the two and it was customary for a king to send his best warrior on his behalf. The Formors would send me, that was for sure. But the Dans had no-one who could put up a true fight, let alone defeat me. Or so they thought. The day before the battle, King Nuada held a feast.

VILLAGERS

Song of Woe

Who’s fought many battles, always won?

We’ve searched the land and found on-one

with spear and sword

to defend our lord.

Only despair attends us.

LUGH (entering)

I’ve fought many battles, a valiant knight!

A super hero, I claim my right:

my spear flashes flames

my sword roars its name.

I have come to defend you.

NUADA

Who are you? What skills do you practice?

LUG

Try me! I’m a carpenter!

NUADA

We have no need of such as you.

LUG

Try me! I’m a blacksmith!

NUADA

We have no need of such as you.

LUG

Try me! I’m a musician!

NUADA

We have no need of such as you.

LUG

Try me! I’m a poet!

NUADA

We have no need of such as you.

LUG

Try me! I’m a magician!

NUADA

We have no need of such as you.

LUG

Try me! I’m a champion!

NUADA

We have great need of such as you. Yes!

We have great need of such as you!

LUG

I am all of these, so let me fight for you tomorrow.

BALAR

And so Lug found his way to court, the master of many skills. He was appointed commander-in-chief in the forthcoming battle.

DIGGERS

Go on!

BALAR
It was a trick. The Goddess of War had betrayed me.

She revealed to Lug how he might be victorious.

The battle commenced.

Our warriors fought bravely, driving back the Dans.

The battle, it seemed, would soon be over.

And then Lug arrived: his sword roared aloud

and his spear flashed fire.

The field flowed red with the blood of the Formors.

I was led to the front, and there faced Lug,

my own grandson.

I raised my eye and in moments

the army of the Dans would perish.

Then came the trick.

Quick as a flash, Lug shot at my eye.

With piercing pain my eye was driven

to the back of my head

until it faced my own army behind me.

I slaughtered the lot of them!

They fell before me. Lug was victorious.

The reign of the Dans had begun;

they were worshipped for their beauty

and their knowledge

while the Formors became the gods of darkness.

We were portrayed as monsters, stupid and slow.

DIGGER 14

So even gods have their quarrels, too?

BALAR

Who are you, anyway? Who is it that I’ve been telling all these things to ?

DIGGERS

We’re archaeologists.

BALAR

What?

DIGGER 15

We dig to uncover the past.

BALAR

Oh, do you now! And I suppose you were the ones that dug me up and disturbed my peace?

DIGGER 16

We didn’t mean to. I mean, the people we dig up are usually - dead.

BALAR

Dead? But gods don’t die, you see. We’re sometimes forgotten for a little while or even for a long time, but we don’t actually die.

DIGGER 17

But you just said you were slaughtered - by Lug, your grandson.

BALAR

Yes, but, being immortal, gods continue to live even though they die. Now, can I rest in peace?

DIGGER 18

But we haven’t told you anything about us. Don’t you want to know about life in the twenty-first century?

BALAR

Not really. I’ve seen it all.

You might have technology,

you might fly through the air,

speak to your friends across the world,

buy what you want without a care.

But we had our magic, our stories and our gods,

so not so much has changed

that is really important.

Life goes on changing.

Time marches on.

BALAR

So let’s get Rosie back to her old self, shall we? In return you must put me back in the soil where I was found.

DIGGER 19

But we don’t want Rosie back!

DIGGER 20

This is the best find we ever came across!

DIGGER 21

She never helps us anyway.

DIGGER 22

She found that old pot...

DIGGER 23

...that was four years ago.

DIGGER 24

Don’t joke about it! Don’t you care?

BALAR

You’ve no choice really. You see, my time is nearly up. I won’t stay here much longer anyway. It’s time to say goodbye. You might as well have Rosie back - she’s not all bad, you know. Now, put me back in the box and let’s get it done with!

DIGGERS

Goodbye, Balar!

BALAR

Take care of yourselves. Oh, and if you like you can sing me to sleep with that harvest song. Reminds me of the old days, so to speak. Cheerio!

TRIBE

We’ve been working in the fields,

gathering in the corn,

bringing home the wheat

to the sound of the horn.

And now our stores are full

we’re ready to rejoice.

Prepare the fatted pig

as we sing with one voice:

Enjoy the food and drink the wine!

Let spirits rise at harvest time!